And it's only Thursday.....not an easy week..a thoughtful week...one of those weeks when my defences are down, I am easily hurt, easily damaged, and once hurt, the healing takes time and is painful. Why do I get like this? Who knows...part of my make up...hormones...or maybe I am a delicate flowers who needs to pull herself together!!!
Tuesday was not a good day..started on Monday evening when I started to lose the plot, and the small things in life started to upset me..and make me angry..I am discovering in recent months/weeks how angry I am underneath, and that is coming out now..my counsellor has said I have been repressing it for along time...the smallest thing really affects me...I lash out..verbally...
After I have experienced such painful emotions, deep feelings, it takes time for me to get back on track - like after having a bad migraine, I feel drained and weak. Fragile. Misunderstood!!!
Strange week - opened the bank statement to find that someone has been withdrawing cash in the Netherlands - on the card which is still in my purse...the week my friend Jacky's dad died: the week I made a birthday cake and shopped for wedding dresses and realised my mum wouldn't be there to see her grand-daughter married, and it broke my heart for a while...the week I wanted big, strong arms round me to take the pain away...I know, that's what I believe in God for!!! Trust in God, not man...
My second little white pill arrived from the homeopath - duly taken and awaiting results..watch this space..she says it will stabilise me..
Better start packing..off to Liverpool, my home town, home to my roots to spend the weekend with my cousin and his wife. Can't wait. Promise I'll come back all cheered up!
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4 comments:
hug. sorry i've been doing my own angryness this week - wish i could help you/ hold you in yours
Hope the weekend went well - hre's to a better week this week, Katie
hi sally
back on line and catching up...
i'm going to see young lawson on wednesday. i'll check that the seat's not taken before i sit.
just in case.
never got a chance to say goodbye after the weekend in crewe. thanks for sorting it all and thanks for the chat on saturday night. frankly they could have done without the sessions and just let us catch up and make new friends - such an approach will go just as far to get everyone working for each other's ends than flow charts and brainstorms imho!
anyway be cool and relax in the knowledge that even though life is fragile there's an awful lot of bubble wrap around. i'll have a good thought for you and maybe i'll see you on wednesday.
smiles
Thanks Darren, I also plan to come to the gig on Wednesday.It would be an honour to sit with you and share my dinner with you! It was good to catch up in Crewe..see you Weds!!! xxx
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