After a shower and beautifully prepared microwaved porridge, I bid Caroline farewell, and headed towards the sunny sea side resort of Weston Super Mare. Not quite so sunny today..more wind and rain, but hey...I found myself crying again as I drove, and when my cousin Johnny rang to see if I was ok, I was able to blub a bit and off load some of my emotions. As he and Jean has stayed overnight at hotel in Weston, they promised to meet me in the Crem. car park and take care of me.
From the minute I stepped out of my car and was consumed in a huge hug, I was fine. Absolutely fine. Other people needed me to be strong today, and strong I would be. My brother and his wife arrived - haven't seen them since June!!! All us cousins got together and suddenly there, amidst the tears, was a lot of laughter, and a feeling of family.The service was short but moving, and my aunt's brother Tom talked about their childhood, getting bombed out of Liverpool during the war and moving to Wales. I always thought they were Welsh - another Liverpool connection and I never knew!!!
I had one of those awkward funeral conversations which actually nearly made me giggle..I went to speak to Tom after and tell him how lovely his talk had been. He asked how I knew Joy, and I reminded him I was Pete's daughter..'Oh,'he said, his eyes lighting up, shaking my hand, 'Pete and Betty, of course, how are they?'
We all went back to a hotel overlooking Weston bay - the tide was out about three miles, the sea was a muddy windswept brown, and we all looked out of the window at at a depressing winter's day - except for the smokers who donned their coats and clung on to the balcony rail out in the wind while they puffed their weed....
The buffet was lvoely, sandwiches, vol au vents..and there, in the corner was a huge dish of lasagne..and chips!!! Real comfort food! I had a huge plateful, and realised that everyone else had gone for the cold buffet. My cousin, red eyed from crying for her mum, suddenly got the giggles and said, 'Sal, the lasagne and chips were for the children.' Oh. No-one told me. And why????
Oh, we looked at photo albums, reminisced about our childhoods, Christmases spent together, and laughed at the characters our parents had been, and how we had been lucky and lvoed very much. It was a sobering thought to realise that we are now the older generation....the wrinklies..I felt very middle aged and frumpy next to some of my younger and prettier cousins!!!!
My cousin asked anxiously, 'Thank you for coming, has it been awful for you?' 'No,' I said truthfully, 'it has been good to see everyone and share our memories.'
I am determined to invite my cousins, scattered across the country, to Laura's wedding, so we can meet to celebrate something happy..roll on May!!!
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2 comments:
I'm really glad you had some good quality time with your family. Last year when my Gran died and we went up to Philadelphia to have a memorial service for her it was really good to connect with my second cousins who remembered my grandmother too and had different stories to tell. It was a special time and meant a lot.
Thank God for the grace that brings these stronger connections with those around us in the midst of sad occassions.
Love you! xx
Thanks Rach - good to hear from you!xx
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